Feels Like Old Times

A milestone, of sorts, this week: I've now maintained this blog for two years! The days of me staying home with Celia seem like the distant past, though those wonderful couple of months gave me the necessary material to launch this blog.

I've been thinking a lot about March, 2010 this week. Despite weathering a head cold, cough, a round of amoxicillin, and the stomach bug that has torn through every school and daycare like a hot knife through butter, Celia has now managed to pick up a nasty case of bronchiolitis, which has forced her to stay home since Monday afternoon. Natalia and I have been alternating sick days so Celia has enjoyed a lot of one-on-one attention this week. And she's largely doing fine, now...her breathing is better, coughing has subdued somewhat, and she's in good spirits. Sunday and Monday were a very different story.

Since returning from paternity leave, I've done a much better job (with about a 6 month exception) of maintaining a non-permeable barrier between work and home. This has been a good change. On days when I am at home taking care of either Celia or Andres, I don't feel compelled to sit them in front of the TV or rush them off to bed so that I can steal time on my laptop; I basically chalk the day up as a lost one (from a work perspective) and then, if I need to, address important things at night. I'm under no grand illusions that anything I do during my 9-5 is so urgent that the world will stop spinning if I am out for a day.

So this week I have had a couple of those days--Tuesday and today, Thursday--and it has taken me back to two years ago when I had a lot of these days gloriously strung together, spent with the same person I am spending them with now.

I went back and reread some of my first posts. I remember writing this one, sitting next to Celia as she lolled around on a blanket, happy to be outside after a cold winter spent in. She was a pretty quiet kid back then...though maybe all babies are quiet compared to what we deal with on a daily basis now.

Contrast that memory with today's reality. Though she is supposed to be napping as I write this sentence, she is talking to her stuffed animals in her crib. And now she's singing a song about princesses. She's definitely not napping.

I also remember doing this photo shoot with her. I had to put her in her Bumbo seat because she couldn't sit up yet; and despite my numerous attempts to make her smile, she didn't want any of it. (On the plus side, I didn't need to worry about her sitting still.)

I tried to take some photos of her today, too. But in only two years she has changed so much--the development of opinion being one of the most significant changes--and she is no easier to photograph. (I tried to take some pictures of her as we were playing Candy Land, but she wouldn't look up at me--she was too busy rifling through the deck to pick out the pick candy cards. House rules. "Celia say cheese!" I said. "Daddy I doing something" came the reply.)

The afternoon nap, which is supposed to be occurring right now, is the only custom that remains from my leave. We left bottles a long time ago, and the morning nap is a distant (but beautiful) memory. Ok, we haven't fully kicked diapers yet either, but I prefer not to think about those too much. I certainly can't carry her in the Bjorn anymore, and even her stroller goes largely unused...though she did ask for a stroller ride on Tuesday afternoon. (It was a beautiful day and she was still feeling crappy; I happily obliged.)

So though it's been a bad week (health-wise) for Celia, it's been a good one for me. Selfish, I know...but it's been fun to take care of her and think about how much she has grown over the past two years. Soon she will be feeling better and will head back to daycare, and I'll have a chance to make up all of my lost work. Somehow. But this week has been a nice retreat into how things once were, though it was hardly a repeat--just a little reminder.

She's yelling at me now--"Daddy...DADDY! Daaaaaaaaaddy. DADDY come here." so I know she hasn't slept at all. Two hours of "naptime," no shuteye. Didn't used to be like this! Times do change, I guess.